Durham

Recently, SFBig and the advertising world lost a giant. John Durham was the founder of SFBig but he was much more. He helped build a new industry into a community. He was a lifelong teacher, a lover of great food, wine and conversation. He was a mentor and key figure in countless success stories. To so many, he was a treasured friend. He was The Durham.

A Celebration of John’s life will take place on Saturday, January 22^nd, 2022 on ZOOM! Please see the login information below

Please click the link below to join the webinar:
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/88171115165?pwd=ZUFuTUZEcDJEOEtUS0hzbTdmaE16Zz09

Passcode: Durham

Or One tap mobile :
US: +16699009128,,88171115165#,,,,786001# or +13462487799,,88171115165#,,,,786001#
Or Telephone:
Dial(for higher quality, dial a number based on your current location):
US: +1 669 900 9128 or +1 346 248 7799 or +1 253 215 8782 or +1 312 626 6799 or +1 646 558 8656 or +1 301 715 8592
Webinar ID: 881 7111 5165
Passcode: 786001
International numbers available: https://us02web.zoom.us/u/khh9JGnIm

For other questions, contact [email protected].

If the measure of a man is the lives he has touched, there is no tape or ruler long or deep enough to measure the impact of John Durham. – Rishad Tobaccowala

Here, we have collected his Durhamisms along with remembrances of those who knew him well.

Durhamism. (n) An aphorism describing life and truth. A compass that guides the willing toward a life well-lived. A sorbet for the soul. If Cole Porter had written koans, they would be Durhamisms.

Affection & Liking

Appreciation (past present future)

Commitment & Responsibility

Courage & Attitude

Faith (not religion) & Spirituality

Friendship

Health & Healing

Humor & Joy

Intelligence & Learning

Life

Love

Moments

Remembrances

Respect

1111

Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then...

1123

Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get...

1124

Love the way you look, look the way you love. Love yourself first and everything else...

1125

The past is a guidepost, not a hitching post. People are always asking about the good...

1126

Learn how to exhale, the inhale will take care of itself. To live is not breathing;...

1127

In skating over thin ice, our safety is in our speed. Success will never be a...

1128

If the whole world was blind, how many people would you impress? No beauty shines brighter...

1129

A real friend knows when to listen, when to stop listening, when to talk, when to...

1130

Whatever life gives you, even if it hurts, just be strong, and put on your game...

1122

Feed your faith and your tears will starve to death. Faith can move mountains, but don’t...

1121

A person has three choices in life. You can swim against the tide and get exhausted,...

1120

A smile is something you can’t give away; it always comes back to you. All the...

1112

Life isn’t measured by the number of breaths you take, but by the number of moments...

1113

How many roads must a man walk down before he admits he’s lost?...

1114

The world needs dreamers and the world needs doers. But above all, the world needs dreamers...

1115

If you’re going to burn the bridge, torch the motherfucker....

1116

Be the master of your fate, be the captain of your soul, but do not hesitate,...

1117

Kindness, like a boomerang, always returns. The kindest word in all the world is the unkind...

1118

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to...

1119

Don’t put the key to happiness in someone else’s pocket. Happiness is not a state to...

1712

The illterate of the 21st century will not be those who cannot read and write, but...

1713

Life marks us all down, so it’s just as well that we start out by overpricing...

1714

All men should strive to learn before they die what they are running from, and to,...

1715

The naïve follow their hearts. The wise lead with their hearts. In the jurisdiction of the...

1716

“In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an Invincible summer.”...

1717

A man with one watch knows what time it is; a man with two watches is...

1718

If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might them sorrows know how...

1719

Love’s sweetest language is a kiss. The love game is never called off on account of...

1720

Never let your emotions rule, but always let them testify. Memory is always faulty. Emotions are...

1711

Before we work on artificial intelligence why don’t we do something about natural stupidity? The trouble...

1140

Go the extra mile, it’s never crowded....

1131

The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them. If I...

1132

Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing. Gold cannot be pure and people...

1133

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge...

1134

We visit others as a matter of social obligation. How long has it been since we...

1135

Great minds have purposes, others have wishes. If you don’t decide what your life is about,...

1136

Life always offers you a second chance. It’s called tomorrow. Let yourself move to the next...

1137

The key to happiness is letting each situation be what it is instead of what you...

1138

Don’t chase people. Be an example. Attract them. Work hard and be yourself. The people who...

1139

Don’t let someone who has done nothing tell you how to do anything....

1732

Don’t love what you can’t trust. Don’t hate what you can’t have. Don’t say what you...

1733

Refuse to lose. Refuse to be defeated. Refuse to be cheated and refuse to have regrets....

1734

Sometimes life hands you a chance. It hands you something amazing, you almost think it’s a...

1735

Life is like a camera. Just focus on what’s important, capture the good times, develop from...

1736

Don’t ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, or my kindness from weakness....

1737

Live without pretending, love without depending, listen without defending, speak without offending. Breathe it all in,...

1738

You are only going to be as good as the people you surround yourself with. So...

1739

Remember you’re braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think....

1740

You find hope the same way you find happiness. You give it someone else and borrow...

1731

F.R.I.E.N.D.S: Fight for you, Respect you. Include you. Encourage you. Need you. Deserve you. Stand by...

1730

Forget what hurt you but never forget what it taught you. I am thankful for my...

1721

“Never give in… never, never, never, never, in nothing great or small, large or petty, never...

1722

To live in this world, you must be able to do three things: to love what...

1723

Interchangeable parts don’t, leakproof seals aren’t and self-starters won’t....

1724

Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, loves gives us a...

1725

Love puts the fun in together, the sad in aprat, and the joy in a heart....

1726

There are some people in life that make you laugh a little louder, smile a little...

1727

The reason people find it so hard to be happy is they always see the past...

1728

If anyone asks me, the meaning of our flag, I say to him — it means...

1729

If they respect you, respect them. If they disrespect you, you still respect them. Do not...

1752

It’s easy to get lost when the map is in your hand and not in your...

1753

There are things that we don’t want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t...

1754

When you are unwell, you must cough, sneeze and ache prayer. Pray on the shadowy hillside...

1755

The most important thing in illness is never to lose heart. The I in illness is...

1756

Some people are so boring that they make you waste an entire day in five minutes....

1757

Look at hopelessness in the face and say: “We are simply not meant to be together.”...

1758

Discipline weighs ounces, regret weighs tons. Those who flee temptation generally leave a forwarding address....

1759

We have two kinds of morality side by side: one which we preach but do not...

1760

Life would be perfect, if some people had mute buttons and some had edits buttons, bad...

1751

I quote my soul, I quote my heart. But sometimes I just quote the wine. I...

1750

Sometimes in life you have an appointment with destiny, and sometimes you just have to get...

1741

Freedom begins between the ears. Freedom is the oxygen of the soul....

1742

Our country is not the only thing to which we owe allegience. It is also owed...

1743

Nobody stands taller than those willing to stand corrected. Wash out your ego every once in...

1744

We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart? Light travels faster than sound. That’s...

1745

Wisdom doesn’t necesssarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. They say...

1746

There is a great man who makes every man feel small. But the real great man...

1747

We mature in knowledge and wisdom but never the playground of our hearts. One of the...

1748

Stop waiting for Friday, for summer, for someone to fall in love with you, for life....

1749

We seem to be going through a period of nostalgia, and everyone seems to think yesterday...

1772

The inability to make a decision has often been passed off as patience. Life’s real name...

1773

A man who is “of sound mind” is one who keeps the inner madman under lock...

1774

Never let your emotions rule, but always let them testify. Memory is always faulty. Emotions are...

1775

I’ve learned this about judging people — you can have all the facts and not know...

1776

Life without faith in something is too narrow a space to live. Feed your faith and...

1777

There is no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream....

1778

Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two...

1779

You can accept a falling out that changes your plans, but it’s hard to accept a...

1780

Sometimes a WTF just says it all....

1771

A Rattlesnake, if cornered will become so angry it will bite itself. That is exactly what...

1770

Family faces are magic mirrors. Looking at people who belong to us, we see the past,...

1761

There are secrets I wil take to the grave – and other’s I’d feel safer having...

1762

Best friends don’t necessarily have to talk every day. They don’t even need to talk for...

1763

Often, what seems an impossible climb is just a staircase without the steps drawn in. Love...

1764

Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened. Some people come into our lives and...

1765

In life’s poker game, the optimist sees the pessimist’s night and raises him the sunrise. Your...

1766

The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows. The best teachers teach from...

1767

The shortest distance between two points assumes you know where you’re going....

1768

You’re an old-timer if you can’t remember when setting the world on fire was a figure...

1769

Being a man or a woman is a matter of birth. Being a man or a...

1792

All persons carry with them some means of happiness. Happiness is never stopping to think if...

1793

You can accept reality without believing every yarn it spins. Seems like nothing ever brings you...

1794

One key to success is to have lunch at the time of day most people have...

1795

Get angry, get furious but never crumble to resentment. Resentment is rubbing salt into your own...

1796

Sometimes you can make people forget the past with a present. You can give without loving,...

1797

Lord, where we are wrong, make us willing to change; where we are right, make us...

1798

Memory is always faulty. Emotions are always true. The walls we build around us to keep...

1799

Some people are so boring that they make you waste an entire day in five minutes....

1800

A stranger stabs you in the front. A friend stabs you in the back. Relationships can...

1791

The art of living lies less in eliminating our troubles than in growing with them. I...

1790

Our language has wisely sensed the two sides of being alone. It has created the word...

1781

With arms outstreched I thank. With heart beating gratefully I love. With body in health I...

1782

The light is always shining, to see it we stop focusing on the shadows it casts....

1783

Work is either fun or drudgery. It depends on your attitude. I like fun....

1784

What this country needs is more free speech worth listening to. It is still possible to...

1785

There was never a wise saying that couldn’t be made wiser by adding the words, “and...

1786

Be an angel to someone else whenever you can, as a way of thanking God for...

1787

Life doesn’t hard out ribbons for the best-lived. It’s an internal decoration. We are known to...

1788

Only as high as I reach can I grow, only as far as I seek can...

1789

Some folks are wise and some are otherwise. The trouble with the world is that the...

Extra not numbered

An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up...

1872

We spend January walking through our lives, room by room, drawing up a list of work...

1873

Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more...

1874

Half annoyances of life will disappear if one is only patient under them. Almost all the...

1875

If you do not raise your eyes you will think that you are the highest point....

1876

We crucify ourselves between two thieves: regret for yesterday and fear of tomorrow. We are always...

1877

A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it. The last...

1878

If you are far away from yourself, how could you ever be close to another? What...

1879

The man who says he is willing to meet you halfway is usually a poor judge...

1871

One resolution I have made and try always to keep, is this: to rise above the...

1870

You know you are getting old when it takes too much effort to procrastinate. The two...

1861

No one who achieves success does so without acknowledging the help of others. The wise and...

1862

Wine is a magician, for it loosens the tongue and liberates good stories. There are spunky...

1863

Winter is the slow down, Winter is the search for self, Winter gives the silence you...

1864

The naive follow their hearts. The wise lead with their hearts. In the jurisdiction of the...

1865

Thoughts lead on to purposes; purposes go forth in action; action form habits; habits decide character;...

1866

He who has not Christmas in his heart will never find it under a tree. Christmas...

1867

It isn’t the size of the gift that matters, but the size of the heart that...

1868

A little learning is dangerous, but downright ignorance is even more disastrous. Some folks are wise...

1869

One problem with gazing too frequently into the past is that we may turn around to...

1891

When love is lost, do not bow your head in sadness; instead keep your head up...

1892

Be the master of your fate, be the captain of your soul, but do not hesitate,...

1893

It’s silly when any man assumes that he knows it all. It’s tragic when he does!...

1894

The past is our definition. We may strive, with good reason, to escape it, or to...

1895

In every age “the good old days” were a myth. No one ever thought they were...

1896

Ah, the things we would do if we could — especially in the secure knowledge that...

1897

The walls we build around us to keep sadness out also keeps out the joy. Your...

1898

After you’ve heard two eyewitness accounts of an auto accident, you begin to worry about history....

1899

While we try to teach out children all about life, Our children teach us what life...

1890

When the world says, “Give Up,” Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.” Stubbornly persist, and...

1889

“I must do something” always solves more problems than “Something must be done.” Most of us...

1880

If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make,...

1881

“If you lose hope, somehow you lose the vitality that keeps life moving, you lose that...

1882

I regret less the road not taken than my all-fired hurry along the road I took....

1883

You probably wouldn’t worry about what people thing of you if you could know how seldom...

1884

In what you say of another, apply the test of kindness, necessity, truth, and let nothing...

1885

Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. Eventually you realize that if you’re going to talk...

1886

The simplest questions are the most profound. Where were you born? Where is your home? Where...

1887

Most people want to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch....

1888

Did you ever notice that when you put the words “The” and “IRS” together it spells...

1911

You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage — pleasantly, smilingly,...

1912

We receive three educations, one from our parents, one from our schoolmasters, one from the world....

1913

If you can’t get quiet enough to hear yourself, your life is too loud. There are...

1914

You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless...

1915

Sometimes you can head off a decision you’ll regret by looking into your heart and finding...

1916

The best reason for having dreams is that in dreams no reasons are necessary. Dreams are...

1917

Just as darkness is the absence of light, ignorance is the absence of knowledge, and should...

1918

Opportunity is often difficult to recognize; we usually expect it to beckon us with texts and...

1919

The purpose of life is not to be happy — but to matter, to be productive,...

1910

Champagne, if you are seeking the truth, is better than a lie detector. It encourages a...

1909

Hard work spotlights the character of people: some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their...

1900

Be what you are. This is the first step toward becoming better than you are. You...

1901

The worst thing about a bore is not that he won’t stop talking, but that he...

1902

In a world full of people who couldn’t care less, be someone who couldn’t care more....

1903

Nobody’s perfect, and our fondest memories of anyone are of the amusing ways they proved it....

1904

You know you have found love when you can’t find your way back....

1905

One true friend adds more to our happiness than a thousand enemies add to our unhappiness....

1906

“There are so many ways to call someone an idiot. In the south, you say “bless...

1907

Retirement is having nothing to do and someone always keeping you from it. In retirement, ever...

1908

There are a things you’ve done that come back to haunt you—and things that haunt you...

2381

Never let your emotions rule, but always let them testify. Memory is always fault. Emotions are...

2382

As important as keeping a grasp on reality is keeping a grasp on possibility....

2383

Home is where the heart can laugh without shyness. How is where the heart’s tears can...

2384

Every person is their own ancestor, and every person their own heir. They devise their own...

2385

A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loves you and were helped by you...

2386

The wings of angels are hope and faith. While we are sleeping, angels have conversations with...

2387

We hope with every breath. We love with every smile. Let Hope be your pulse, Faith...

2388

Christmas is forever, not just for one day, for loving, sharing, giving, are not to put...

2389

May you have the gladness of Christmas which is hope; The spirit of Christmas which is...

2380

I value the friend who for me finds time on his calendar, but I cherish the...

2379

It is generally a more productive day when you learn something from life rather than try...

1920

Of all the things you wear, your expression is the most important. It’s not what you...

2371

Five great enemies to peace inhabit with us: avarice, ambition, envy, anger, and pride. If those...

2372

While we try to teach our children about life, Our children teach us what life is...

2373

Life’s real name is Choices. The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to...

2374

One man’s daydreaming is another man’s day. Ah, the things we would do if we could...

2375

Perhaps I have lived my life to excess, but you know what — if I had...

2376

Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics. There are things you...

2377

When people say to me: “How do you do so many things?” I often answer them,...

2378

Nostalgia for what we have lost is more bearable than nostalgia for what we have never...